Chhapri

Perspective on Skinny Dark Boys

Chhapri is a derogatory word often used for skinny dark-coloured males aged 13-18 years coming mostly from underprivileged societies. You would often find them wearing loose jeans, coloured hair, pierced ears and eyebrows and riding with three people on the motorcycle. From what I have seen they receive a good amount of hate and biases from societies and yet do not receive the required empathy and intervention from the social sector.

Whenever I visit corporates and bigger NGOs for partnerships the expectation from them is to work with girls and use football (Why the focus on football is a topic for another time). It is of course expected as data from all over the globe reveals that the attrition rate of girls in sports is very high, especially after adolescence. Also, it is not just about sports, historically, girls and women have faced inequality in terms of getting opportunities. So giving them the opportunity through social programs make sense.

When I go to communities and schools to conduct sessions, it is often the girls that show the most interest and want to be part of the session. Girls welcome the inclusiveness and safety measures designed within the session to make the game more fun for them. In the “Corporatist” business term, I will describe them as low-hanging fruits.

On the other hand, it is very challenging to build rapport with these skinny boys and they run away from you as far as possible. Initially, they do not welcome changes in the rules of the game to make the game more inclusive which requires them to play with girls. In my last five years of working on the ground, they are the ones to disrupt the sessions and cause the most challenges. Therefore, facilitators may not want to include them in the session and may be biased towards skinny-looking dark boys.

It doesn’t mean that sports programs cannot be useful for them. I have seen these boys dropping out early, engaging in drug use, smoking and drinking and other at-risk behaviour at a very early age. Many of these boys grow up without parents and have not received the basic love and care required for social-emotional development. Neglect and malnutrition are the reason they are skinny. Increasing testosterone levels during the early Adolsocene may just push them to attention and power-seeking risky behaviours.

However, I do not see or read about enough conversations happening around these topics or as an important point of conversation while designing and creating social programs in India. It is as though it is their mistake for not grabbing the opportunities provided to them in life growing up as a male. It is possible that many of these boys would have faced more disadvantages (looking at caste, skin colour and economic situation) and bias than the girls from the same community.

The different social expectations of boys and girls in society also make their needs separate. While the needs of the girls may be to get more opportunities, courage, support, motivation and confidence, the need of boys can be of sense of belongingness, empathy, care and better listening.

Next time you are travelling in a bus, train or metro and notice a Chhapri-looking boy, take a moment to reflect on your first impression towards them. Is it the feeling of disgust, indifference or understanding? Is it possible to look beyond those funky appearances and see them for who they are?